November 6th - December 16th, 2024
Wednesday November 6th - Monday December 16th
General Updates and Happenings
I have been SO busy and it feels never ending! I was in Denver for a week in both October and November, with lots of lawsuit activity and medical appointments, travel to Albuquerque regularly, and keeping up with appointments in Taos. I ended up getting multiple surgeries scheduled to remove symptomatic hardware, which I have been eager to do. I tried to get all three taken care of at the same time and it just wasn’t possible, so I ended up going to ABQ for surgery three weeks in a row.
11/26 left arm hardware removal, 12/6 face plate removal, 12/12 left ankle plate removal (more details about each surgery below under medical updates)
I decided to go for all three surgeries back to back after thinking deeply about what it would mean to do it this way vs space them out. I decided it would benefit me to stay in recovery mode rather than popping in and out; this way, I could lean in and do what I know how to do so well… HEAL. In my current financial state, it is also beneficial to have these done before the end of the year when insurance resets, as I’ve met my deductible for 2024. In a way, having these back-to-back surgeries that force me to relax has been a welcome break, though my body is working hard and in pain, and I am exhausted. I can’t sleep enough! Surgery also creates new stress and tension patterns in my body that can be hard to get to calm down, so I figured I might as well pile it on and then work to calm it down rather than doing that cycle three separate times. Widespread pain from head to toe has sure been showing up as I settle in to recovery and try to manage with only ibuprofen and tylenol in addition to my regular meds that help control pain (lyrica, venlafaxine).
11/10-15 Week in Denver:
I was so tired this whole trip! I didn’t love that feeling, but also, sometimes going home can help you let down more when you really need it. I got a lot of good rest on this trip and also wanted quality catch-up time with family and a friend or two, had a CT scan the evening of 10/11, and engaged in lots of lawsuit activity all week.
The day I arrived, I went to the nuggets-mavericks game with my brother and nephew, which was very fun! See photos here. Can you tell we are related or what?!
I so enjoyed time with my mom and brother, and didn’t know this at the time, but also got some really yummy final time with Lyle, my mama’s dog, as soon after we got home from Denver we found out he had an advanced and untreatable type of cancer. He passed away peacefully at home on 11/24.
We had another effort at lawsuit mediation (more on that below), and with all the associated stress of this combine with travel, my body felt worse upon getting back home, but so it goes.
Patrick and I stopped on the way home at the accident site and replenished the flowers in the vase I hung on the fence back in August. If you’re ever doing that drive and feel inclined to stop and/or honor the memorial in any way, reach out and I’ll send you the location!
11/16 Kids' bday party: It was a very fun gathering at Daleee, where I had my 1-year celebration. Beautiful day so it was lovely to sit around outside and catch up with friends. I had the pleasure of holding my friend’s daughter while she fell asleep at the end of the party, which sure made my day.
11/20 Holiday dinner with Patrick’s family in Abq was lovely! We combined this with an existing trip for an orthodontist appointment, which was very helpful. We want to get more time with family and friends and sometimes with all the medical and lawsuit activity, we can’t fit everything in. Some day, our life won’t be so focused on the aftermath of the collision…11/23 Friendsgiving with delicious food and great company; it was very pleasant to get some community time in before surgery on 11/26. It was overall a beautiful day; Patrick and I took the dogs on a walk at the Gorge before dinner and saw a huge big horned sheep!
Thanksgiving was spent healing from arm hardware removal surgery and Patrick cooked up a storm! 3 different Indian food dishes, naan, and carrot cake - yum! Photos here.
I asked my mom to fly in to help with surgery recovery, and it was so wonderful having her here. She flew in on 12/8, met me in ABQ, drove me to my face surgery, picked me up when I was done, and drove us home to Taos. Having her here is heart-filling and comforting support for me, and it is also helpful to give nurse Patrick a little break - plus, he was battling a cold, so it was supportive to let him recover at home while I went for surgery. She also drove me to ABQ Wednesday 12/11 for a couple of appointments, we stayed at my cousin’s, went for ankle surgery 12/12, and drove us back to Taos again after. Patrick’s mom and husband came to visit on 12/14 and brought yummy food and gave us their old dining room table - I was a bit of a zombie but it was lovely to have them and to get our mama’s together. My mom flew home on 12/15, which was bittersweet of course. I miss her already!
With all my recovery, I’ve continued reading up a storm. I read most mornings on the heating pad in our sunroom, and prior to surgeries had been meditating and stretching most mornings too. I hope to get back in the groove of this routine as it sure helps me ground and tune in with my body-mind-spirit. I’ve also recently gotten into cross stitch and completed another fun project before my surgeries - I’ll start another one when my arm is healed enough :)
I continue to be pretty exhausted and fatigued and in pain somewhere all of the time. I know it is a combination of my body working very hard every day to heal, as well as the emotional and mental toll of everything I continue to have to navigate. Life has generally felt harder on the heart these days, though we power through…
Disability benefits: no update; I’ve followed up and my attorneys are working on getting a status update
Victim’s Compensation Fund: no update; I reached out in late Oct and late Nov and finally heard back right after surgery. I need to follow back up.
HSD Benefits: It has been a tremendous help to have SNAP benefits to help with our monthly food costs
Other financial: I need to figure out taxes especially with pulling money from my retirement accounts and having a medical exemption… I’m not sure if I can continue doing this wihtout penalty into the New Year…
Lawsuit:
We had another settlement mediation on 11/13; what a crazy experience! Unfortunately, this was also unsuccessful but there’s always a chance we could still settle… or not.
We are still working on getting another trial date, likely mid-to-late 2025. There are many moving parts and balls in the air, so things feel a bit uncertain. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to the “whiplash” of feeling hopeful, then not, then things change and we are hopeful again. Back and forth it goes like that.
Medical Updates
Surgeries
11/26 to remove L arm plate (L ankle plates were supposed to come out too but this did not happen as planned):
Day of: It was a way longer day than we expected but all went well with removing my arm plate. The plan changed last minute to only take out my arm hardware and not my ankle too so that is a bummer - and a confusing/surprising shift from our pre-op appointment in which I was told doing both would be no problem. Generally, it felt like a big miscommunication and lack of planning ahead of time, though she did say we could do my ankle by the end of the year if that was my goal. I wanted to heal from the two together but oh well. It was quite a busy day in the surgery center! I was there from 12:30-6 for a very short procedure. Anesthesia was a long acting (up to 24-hour) nerve block in my arm and sedation but not general anesthesia.
Recovery: It was nice to be completely numb for the drive home post-surgery and into the next day. Pain got increasingly worse from days 2-6 and since, have been improving. I wasn’t given have any restrictions so have been letting my pain guide me, which got more difficult with needing crutches post-ankle surgery but knowing I couldn’t do damage to the healing bones helped. At nearly 3 weeks out, I continue having some pain in my wrist and along the scar, stiffness and pain in my fingers and hand, but I can do most activities of daily living just fine (washing heavy dishes still gives me pain, for example). Generally my arm and hand feel either better than or about the same as they did prior to surgery and I’m eager to see how things continue to progress over the next weeks. Typing is already a big improvement! Recovery photos here.
Next steps: x-rays taken at ankle surgery on 12/12 and will see surgeon for follow-up on 12/27
12/6 surgery to remove facial plate:
Scheduling and pre-op conversations:
11/27 Plastics and Reconstructive Surgeon: CT scan f/u appt
Sinus issue: My sinuses look pretty healthy from the CT scan, with a slight thickening of the mucosa in the left maxillary sinus compared to my right. This was better than we expected, so no need to explore further right now.
Exposed plate in nose: Because my sinuses looked pretty healthy and I continue to have a bad smell and discharge from my left nostril, my surgeon recommended following up with the oral surgery team about scheduling removal of the exposed plate. Hopefully this will help with the sinus health overall and take care of the yucky smell; if it doesn’t I may need to go on continuous antibiotics which would not be ideal.
I emailed my oral surgery team on Monday, 12/2, and got a call that afternoon letting me know they could get me in for surgery Friday, 12/6. Wowee! Did not expect it to move that fast. Tuesday 12/3 I spent most of the day on the phone trying to get my recent CT scan to the surgeon - I didn’t know they needed it! - with no luck. I spoke to the surgeon around 2:30 pm and she was unsure if it was a plate that went in with my original repairs and is at the floor of my nose or if it is one they put in last Nov with my jaw reconstruction. I was 99% sure it came from the jaw reconstruction, but she was confused about how a plate from that surgery could be coming out in my nose. That was a little bit concerning but I remained hopeful. We decided that I would bring my computer with the CT scan for her to review prior to surgery.
I tried to get my ankle plate removal surgery added with no luck. I communicated with my surgeons about this and was happy to hear they were even reaching out to each other to try and coordinate. Hearing that made me feel cared about!
Day of: My surgeon reviewed my CT scan and felt good about the plan to remove the plate or at least the parts that are exposed. She said sometimes plates become embedded in bone and due to my extensive facial trauma and bone loss, she would not want to remove any parts that are embedded and could simply cut off the part that is exposed. I went under general anesthesia and she was able to remove the whole thing, with no complications or concerns. This is a huge relief. The plate is bigger than I expected! Photos here.
Recovery: I’ve been managing my pain well with lots of ice and rest as well as, of course, pain meds (5 mg oxy, tylenol, ibuprofen, lydocaine mouth rinse). On day 2 I woke up very swollen and with my lip blistering, but that has been the worst so far. The swelling calmed down on day 3 and the lip blister didn’t fully form but just dried up and peeled off. I have an incision in my upper gums where they went in to take the plate out and am on a soft food diet until the incision heals. On 12/10, my stitches on the far left upper side started getting stuck on my braces and causing a lot of pain. I figured out how to put wax on my braces and protect the stitches but they are quite irritated. I’ve had to continue wearing wax on most of my upper left through midline braces as my inner lip and incision/stitches are very irritated by the brackets. As of 12/15, I still have what I think is about half of the stitches in my mouth and continue to be careful with what I eat and making sure my mouth stays clean. I have to be careful with my sinuses for a month, so cannot blow my nose, shouldn’t sniff strongly, no flying on airplanes and avoid popping my ears. The congestion and intermittent pain in my nose is uncomfortable but continues to improve.
Next steps: follow-up with surgeon 12/19
12/12 L ankle hardware removal surgery
Scheduling and pre-op conversations: Thursday, 12/8, I got a call from my surgeon to follow up about scheduling the hardware removal. She said she could do any Tue or Thurs the rest of the year. I decided to just go ahead and schedule for 12/12 to continue batching my surgery recoveries together rather than starting to feel better and be more active and then have to go back and have surgery. I was surprised she called me from her personal cell phone to discuss scheduling and seemed eager to meet my needs.
Day of: Like my arm surgery, anesthesia was a nerve block that numbed my leg from the knee down and sedation. Unlike my arm surgery day, check in and prep for surgery went very quickly! I checked in at 9:30 and was in the OR by 10:30. The procedure was more complicated than expected and took close to 2 hours. My distal tibia had healed so well from the original repair that some of the screws were very embedded in the bone, so she had to drill to get them out. Ouch!
Recovery: I had been using crutches until 12/15 when I started putting weight on my ankle and switched to my cane. I have been surprised by the continued numbness and tingling in my leg from the knee down and the top of my foot and very intense pain. The surgoen called about 24 hours out from surgery to see how I was doing as she was worried about pain management; at that time, I was still numb from the nerve block, so didn’t have concerns. 12/15 I decided to call and check in and was very reassured by her lack of surprise at the continued numbness and pain, she explained more detail about how my nerves were affected (not likely damaged) from the procedure, that I can weight bear as tolerated and will actually heal faster if I can stress the bones, and to work on range of motion exercises. She also said she can call more pain meds if needed but I might find more benefit from increasing ibuprofen than anything else. So, I'm experimenting with this and haven’t had oxy in 48 hours and am increasing my weight bearing, working on range of motion, and continuing to elevate and ice. Recovery photos here.
Unfortunatley on 12/16 I started noticing more general widespread pain and tension patterns showing up than I was having previously. Given my experience with previous surgeries and how my body reacts, I am not surprised but it is hard to manage. I can’t get comfortable and am simply exhausted. Hopefully this levels out soon! I also have been cancelling most of my appointments but hope to get back on the train with a massage tomorrow and myofascial chiropractor Friday.
Next steps: remove bandage and finally shower on 12/19, x-rays taken post-surgery 12/12, will retake and see surgeon for follow-up on 12/27
Hardware art project: I have received so much hardware these last few weeks I have a fun art project idea incorporating dried flowers from our garden… more soon!
Surgery center bright spot: The staff and providers at the outpatient surgery center have gotten to know me well by now, and at my last surgery on 12/12, I felt like the bell of the ball! Everyone was excited to see me; people working that day but not assigned to my care even came to say hello, check on me, and wish me well. It felt very comforting and like they are all on my team <3
Mouth
11/20 Orthodontist: long appointment with another orthodontist in the practice who I hadn’t met yet. I was expecting to see my regular orthodontist and was surprised she wasn’t there. I was eager to see if she had any insight on the pending issue of taking out the exposed plate in my nose because she regularly sees my oral surgeon. Regardless, it was a positive appointment with good progress yet again. For some reason, I had to keep my mouth open longer than usual, causing increased jaw tension and headaches.
12/11 Orthodontist: I was excited to see my orthodontist and get a progress update from her. My front teeth have moved quite a bit since my last adjustment (photos here), which they said is good progress. With having sutures in my mouth from the recent face surgery, they were pretty careful and didn’t make too many adjustments but did reshape my front teeth a tiny bit. It feels like she rubs sandpaper between my teeth (yikes!). Next time, we will reshape the front teeth more as well as most of the bottom teeth which will help them align better, reposition the brackets on the front teeth, and update wires top and bottom. Hopefully I’m getting close to being done but hard to say. She did think the tissue in my upper gums looks happier than before my recent face surgery which was reassuring to hear.
Eyes
Vision: no changes, I am still not comfortable driving at night and often have difficulties with sunlight and indoor lighting reflections.
Dryness also continues to be an issue and I continue to use drops many times a day and gel at night to keep my eyes moist. My eye dr gave me a sample of a prescription eye drop that might help with dryness so we will see.
11/25 eye eval to help get in with neuro-ophthalmology; they sent the records, so hopefully, I will hear soon. I’ll probably need to follow up myself to get an appointment. Neuro-ophthalmology requires a dilated eye exam as a pre-requisite to getting an appointment. It was interesting talking to my eye dr about this because she said dilated eye exams don’t tell us anything different from the computer scans they now do that don’t require dilation. Dilated eye exams are an outdated standard of care. Regardless, we dilated my eyes as required since you have to play the game.
12/11 I got a message from neuro-ophthalmology that they still don’t have my records, so I need to follow-up and get the resent. Ugh. Always something!
Other Orthopedic
Knees
They’ve continued hurting a lot, though with my recent back-to-back surgeries and being less active, they’re accordingly less noticeable. I have pain when I go from standing to sitting, but I don’t feel the regular dull ache that I feel when I’m more on the go. Post ankle surgery I’m starting to feel more left knee pain again especially when lifting my leg.
Cold laser treatment has helped reduce myofascial tension patterns above and below my knees, but the tension is deep and layered; my providers keep discovering new patterns. It is both fascinating and frustrating to experience this. I have to remember how much trauma my body, and especially my legs, went through and give them a break :)
R Hip
I’m unsure how much the cortisone hip injection worked as I am still having regular instability and pain, though just like my knees, with less activity, my hip is doing better. Even with using crutches for a few days post ankle surgery and putting most of my weight on the right leg, my hip managed better than I expected.
My orthopedic doctor referred me to a hip preservation specialist in Boulder, and I’m waiting to get in with them. I need to call and follow up with them too.
PT: it was already difficult scheduling in November, and then, with all the surgeries happening, I canceled my December appointments. They are eager to have me back at the beginning of the year!
General
Bodywork:
I love my people! What a wonderful and supportive care team I have; truly do not know what I would do without them. I am eager to get back into a weekly groove of seeing all of my providers and helping my body calm down post-surgeries.
It has been hard to get in with the pain injection specialist but I will see him in Jan.
Mental health:
I was able to have a couple of ketamine sessions leading up to mediation which I think helped me a lot. I unfortunately haven’t been able to schedule any additional sessions and need to follow up.
I had a few great therapy sessions leading up to my arm surgery and since, haven’t felt up to much more than being home and resting. I am scheduled to see her weekly after my surgeries are behind me. I’m so lucky to have her; she is excellent. I feel brighter when I leave the sessions and appreciate the bodywork she coaches me through that releases trauma.
I also started a new antidepressant that is simultaneously good for pain; I’m excited about this potentially helping me with several of my conditions (PTSD, headaches, pain).
I have been having nightmares periodically the last two months and wake up with Patrick comforting me, though I don’t remember what I was dreaming about.
My digestive system has been a bit wonky with all the travel, stress, surgeries and meds, etc. I am working with all the tools I know well to try and stay regular, but it is a challenge! I tend very easily towards constipation so going through all this sure takes a toll.
General upkeep: Wow, there is a lot going on! Despite it all, I feel I am doing shockingly well and navigating through this wild unpredictable life. I certainly have my ups and downs and the last couple of days feel more in a low; it is hard to go through another holiday season with the current state of my life being what it is. And, I know it is all temporary.
On the Horizon
Getting back in the groove of weekly appts in Taos: bodywork, pain management, myofascial chiropractic, PT, behavioral health
Weekly meetings with legal team for civil suit
12/19: ABQ Face Surgery Follow-up
12/27: ABQ L Ankle Surgery Follow-up
1/8: ABQ Orthodontist
TBD: Boulder Hip Preservation Specialist, Denver Neuro-Ophthalmologist
